18 hours ago
Thursday, July 3, 2008
When you're pregnant everyone tells you how you'll never sleep again, how your body will change, how you'll never go out at night again - all of which is true to an extent - but they never tell you how your wardrobe will change. And they don't tell you that you will have a new (very small) personal stylist dictating what you wear and why...
For a start, no one ever let me in on the dirty little secret that it is almost impossible to accessorise with a baby or toddler around. Dangly earrings will be ripped from your ears, cuffs and bangles make great teething rings, don't even think about necklaces (especially ones with delicate chains) unless you are in the mood to be strangled, and the great big cocktail rings of which I was always so fond? Well, they sit lonely and abandoned because they just don't quite work when you are constantly washing your hands, changing nappies, and handling a small person with delicate, easily scratched baby skin.
And, yes it is true that white and cream silk dry clean only things will fall victim to grubby hand prints and baby vomit within seconds, and it is difficult to chase an active toddler in heels (although it can be done, I'm here to tell you), but if I read one more article prevailing on me to dress myself as a "yummy mummy" in bootcut jeans, ballet flats and a flattering longline cardigan then I might just implode. I'm sure I could dress like that and look perfectly reasonable (if somewhat stumpy) but I just wouldn't feel like me. When you become a parent there's a lot of faking it til you make it, and plenty of feeling like an imposter (me, someone's mum, really?), without having to dress like someone else as well.
So this blog is about my attempts to keep my sense of personal style and my lifelong playful approach to fashion despite being the mother of a two year old (magnificent beastie that he is), in my mid-30s, 4 kilos heavier than I'd like to be, having no time or energy and living on only one income (because I'm a "stay at home mum"). Oh yeah, no tripod or decent camera either (but you'll work that out for yourselves pretty quickly when you see my photos). And I might wear the occasional pair of ballet flats, but there will be no bootcut jeans, no tasteful scarves jazzing up comfy knitwear, and no flattering longline ANYTHING.
Well, here we are in 2013 and things have changed marginally here and there, although the basics remain the same whether we are in Bondi, Burleigh, St Kilda or god knows where else. I'm in my slightly weatherbeaten early-40s now, and the little dude is still a magnificent beastie even as he approaches seven years old (!). His baby vomit and grubby toddler paws are less of a limitation on my wardrobe these days, but now I'm subject to his very definite opinions on what I wear (particularly to school). I'm about as many kilos as I'd like to be, my current tripod is a four buck Taiwanese op shop veteran and I still don't have a decent camera (although I don't have to balance a video camera in stills mode on top of a wheelie bin to take my photos like I did in the early days of this blog). I haven't owned any ballet flats in years, but the approved yummy mummy uniform seems to have moved on from the bootcut jean/longline cardy combo to a tunic with leggings/skinny jeans, knee high boots and furry gilet combo. It's better than it used to be, but still depressing that there's a sort of uniform at all, and the concept of yummy mummies is as gross as it ever was. I still love youse all, though!